November 03, 2005

Whorelando

I can neither confirm nor deny that I will be in Orlando, Florida next weekend. Two hip-and-happenin' single girlfriends of mine have some "gentleman callers" who live down that way, and the gay divorcées desire to get they freak on, in a big way. Naturally, their first thought was, "Queenie! We need Queenie to come with us!" Um...I'm flattered to be asked, and would chew my foot off to escape the cage that my home has become, even if only for a weekend...but why? They don't need a chaperone, or a chauffeur. I'm as frigid as your icebox, so I won't be a troll-assist, or a wingman, taking one for the team. I have cash, but am not loaded with it, so the draw can't be my bankroll. Moreover, I am just about as bubbly and effervescent as Eeyore these days. So I don't get it, at all. As usual, I find myself at a loss.

I envision myself ensconced at the bar of the Gaylord Palms, in some soft and plushy chair, watching football. Alone. And heaving sighs, and feeling sorry for myself. The puzzler? I'll probably go anyway. You do the math on that one; sometimes I am incomprehensible to myself.

Any readers in Orlando? Can I buy you a beer?

Posted by Queenie at November 3, 2005 08:03 PM | TrackBack
Comments

Whorelando...I fucking love it...

If I could, you could.

Smack Mickey for me.

Posted by: Yabu at November 3, 2005 08:44 PM

Actually, I will be in Orlando visiting the Inlaws, doing the Disney Food and Wine Festival thing next weekend.

Posted by: Sean at November 4, 2005 12:00 AM

I live in Orlando, but may be out of town that particular weekend. Going up to Tennessee to pick up a 1929 Chevrolet. Just like the one I had in high school. Which weekend is it?

Posted by: Captain Harley at November 4, 2005 02:19 AM

Jeez Queenie, I'd fly to Orlando just to watch football wit yuz.

Posted by: wavemaker at November 4, 2005 07:28 AM

what wavemaker said. Actually detour over to little rock and I'll buy you a beer or three...

think I could cheer ya up, too

Posted by: Circa Bellum at November 4, 2005 09:02 AM

I live just 30 min. west of Orlando. I'll email you.

Posted by: Dana at November 4, 2005 11:45 AM

Disneyworld takes on a whole new definition now.

;-)

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